The Ice Side of Life
by FanSlewFantasy
Summary: Seme!UK, inappropriate use of ice-lollies... what more could a fan want from their yaoi? Don't like, graciously do not read. Old fic was deleted. Re-Posted. M for a reason. HILLBILLY TRANSLATION IN 2ND CHAPTER. Seriously bruh.
1. Chapter 1

**REPOSTED: thanks to all those who read and favourited om my old account, and my apologies. its an old fic, and not as good as my newer ones for which i am ashamed, but it seemed to go down pretty well last time. so i thought i owed it to the people who liked it to re-publish.  
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><p>I felt like inappropriate use of icecream, so here it is.<p>

Kyah… that's a scary thought. I MUST NOT STOP WRITING! You know sharks? If they stop swimming they die… if I stop writing I will probably turn into a shark.

…

The ice lolly was melting, sticky raspberry dripped onto my knuckles, but I didn't notice. He held my attention, a tall man, broad shouldered and youthful, with electric eyes that never rested to long on one point. Violent blue, sparkling like cut glass in the sunlight, he looked away from me and ran elegant fingers through shaggy blonde hair. One mutinous lock remained standing, erect and quivering. He parted bowed lips to speak, I don't bother to listen. His words were foolish, young. They formed ideas of zombie viruses and mega-fighting car-bot wars. Nothing valid, the whims of a man with ADD and too much power fell on my deaf ears and lost in thought I raised the ice block to my lips. A small suck, the flavour was tart but I liked it.

"Hey, Iggy, are you listening?"

"No." I tilted my head to the side, watching with interest as his handsome face registered shock and then mild offense, mouth twisting into a small pout. He pushed his glasses further up the bridge of his nose.

"But I need your help! How am I supposed to build my car-bot without your money?"

"I didn't raise you to piss away money on car-bots, Alfred." Another suck on my ice block. "You go ahead and do whatever you like, I really don't care, but I'm not helping you and I want nothing to do with it."

The man wasn't happy. His shoulders slumped noticeably, his eyes narrowed into an evil glare. It was fortunate we were alone; the shadow of ill humour that descended upon the small office was enough to make any human heartily depressed.

"What are you trying to say?"

"I'm saying, Alfred. That your ideas are stupid and that you are a bad, bad boy. You need to learn to grow up and begin spending money on important things, like cancer research and ending poverty."

"Oh what do you know, you're just a stupid old man" he tossed his head and sat down on the edge of his desk. It creaked under his weight. Alfred looked fit enough, but with all the burgers and sweets he ate, it was a case of looks can be deceiving.

I scowled and stood.

"You're a brat, you know that? All you ever think about is food and sex and car-bots." I pressed the tip of my ice block to his throat, standing on my toes so my eyes were level with his. Those gemlike eyes fixed on my face; I narrowed my own, challenging him.

This was the nature of us, I suppose. Adoptive brothers, father and son, enemies with ties that webbed beneath our skin like veins. These seams that bound us against our will sometimes flooded with hate, other times a strange pride in one another. Sometimes still, they pulsed with tension relieved only by the touch of hands and skin, kisses burning with fierce rivalry, the body of the enemy, a mockery of the days we spent as family.

This was the nature of my fickle son, and the lessons I had learned from him over the years. We were as bad as each other, infected by one another; we were parts of the same whole.

We made a decent team, despite the obvious flaws.

So I suppose, on the surface, it made sense.

"Car-bots are important, I think. Who else will defend us when we are invaded by mars?"

"_If _we are invaded by mars." I slid the ice lolly up his neck, along his jaw to his ear. A faint, glistening red line of raspberry remained. His eyes flickered shut and I smirked widely. "Say it, Al. _If_ we are invaded by mars."

"We will be invaded by mars."

"tsk tsk… even at a time like this you misbehave. Do as you are told just once in your life." I lean in and run my tongue along his jaw, lapping up the cool trail left on his skin. "Yeah?"

"wh-what will you do if I don't?"

"Well, you have to be punished, don't you?"

"And if I'm good?"

"Then you get a reward."

"hmm…" half cast eyes rested on my hand, still holding the ice lolly to the side of his law. Perhaps he could only see it with peripheral vision. In any case, the unfocused blue was endless, breathtaking. Familiar.

"Well, I suppose you'd better punish me then. Because id rather die than give up my car-bots."

"Git." I pressed my leg between his and his chin fell forward, hair obscuring his face.

My knee, I ground it upward, not missing the white knuckles that implied a tightened grip on the edge of the desk. I nuzzled his bangs softly, my free hand caressing his cheek and grabbing his chin. A sharp gasp was the only thing he gave me, a minor indication of the hammering heartbeat I could feel echoed in my chest. My lips flirted with his jaw line, teasing the very corner of his mouth. When our lips met, I dropped my hand, my face holding his in place.

His lips are very chapped, actually. I always took care of mine, the small rose chapstick I carried in my ass pocket was somewhat of a moot to tease in the eyes of nations like France, but it was all worth it to turn this little brat to jelly. His eager tongue couldn't resist flicking for a taste, his neat teeth curiously nibbling, trying the waters. I reined him in with a threatening nip, taking my sweet time and slipping against his tongue, pressing a little, stroking, toying. A muffled groan, the faintest grind upward against my hip. His tongue laxed and let me plunder the inside of his mouth. The roof, his teeth, I massaged each spot with dedicated consideration, coaxing carnal sounds from deep inside his chest.

When I pulled back, his cheeks had darkened considerably. His eyes glazed. A slender string of saliva, glistening and taught, slung between out lips lazily. I wiped my mouth on the back of my hand and murmured a disgusted something, a blush of embarrassment fluttered over his already pinkened cheeks. The wholesome flush of a virgin was replaced with the wanton, humiliated red of a little bitch. I smirked and ground my leg harder. His lips parted in a soft moan, eyes falling shut. I licked the drippings of ice block off my hand carelessly and regarded him with a calm eye.

"You want it Al?"

Staring pointedly at the spot to the left side of my face, he nodded, expression pained.

"No, you say it, or you get nothing." My leg again. another strangled moan, he crumpled completely against me, legs giving way. His head shook fiercely.

"Oh? What a shame. And look at you too, completely desperate. Have you been starved, Al? You've been waiting for ages, haven't you?"

Pleading eyes met mine, he clawed at my shirt and the burning fever I had seen lurking at the back of his mind for the past week suddenly allowed to flood to the surface. It was amusing to see, actually, after watching it barely contained through meeting after meeting. Through seemingly normal conversations and average arguments.

"Please Arthur…"

"You were waiting for this exact moment though. I know. Why else did you invite me here to your office? As if you'd give a damn about my opinion on your stupid car-bots…"

"Arthur…"

"'oh, Iggy, mind coming through to talk to me for a moment about a new idea of mine?'" I did my best, and surprisingly passable imitation of his drawlish southern accent as I quoted him. "you may as well have said 'Arthur, fuck me please, I _need_ it."

A soft whimper, he nuzzled my shirt. The malicious curve of my lip grew more pronounced and I tongued my ice block, giving him a thoroughly bored look.

"Fine." I ruffled his hair and stepped back, leaving him to catch himself. "If you want it so bad, beg me. Get down on your knees and beg."

He seemed surprised at that, lips forming a slack 'o'. I cocked an eyebrow and inclined my head down. He knew what I meant.

_Kneel_

Humbly, holding back tears, he lowered himself to his knees and shuffled forward. His hands on my belt buckle took me by surprise. I jumped and whacked his hands away.

"Not today you prick! I said beg, not suck me off."

His lip trembled and he lowered his head. I used my foot to tip his chin back, so he was looking at me.

"Please… Arthur."

"Please Arthur what?"

"Please… fuck me."

I grinned even wider. Victory.

"No."

He blinked, looking for a moment like I had kicked him. I patted his head as I rounded him and sat on the edge of his desk.

"But feel free to come here and fuck my leg if you wish." I offered my right leg to him, he gazed at me hopelessly over his shoulder.

"Come on then."

I shuffled forward further, so the ball of my foot was flush against the wooden floor. He removed his glasses with shaking hands and stood. I held out a palm in an offer to take the glasses from him but as he approached, he placed them tenderly on the bridge of my nose instead.

"Take care of Texas, please."

That comment, such a humble, genuine request, threw me off for an instant. a small window of time in which I suddenly felt a rush of affection and overwhelming love for the man was slammed shut again as soon as he straddled my upper leg and placed his hands firmly on the desk either side of my hips.

"Do you want me to kiss you while you do it?" I inquired, bracing myself with one arm for what was about to follow. He nodded, and lifted his face a little, imploringly. The faint pucker of his lips was almost sweet. I tried not to loose heart in what was going on. My face slammed against his and I forced my way back inside his mouth. He groaned and slowly, hesitantly, ground himself against my thigh.

His erection must have been painful. It pressed hard against my leg and tented the tight denim of his jeans dramatically. I twirled my tongue a little and focused in the feeling of it sliding against me. I liked it, I liked it a lot.

But I had long since mastered ignoring my own.

Maybe I'm a good person, maybe I get more pleasure out of pleasing him than he gets out of pleasing me. It didn't particularly matter. My sole purpose today was to make him cum as messily and as undignified as I possibly could. I could have a wank later, if the need arose. Alfred could only be seen to now.

He sped up as I dipped deeper into his mouth, muffled moaning punctuated by the obscene sound of cloth against cloth, the slick smack of lips and tongues, irregular gasps for air. His arms supporting him on the desk quivered, I removed my lips from his and licked them, a flood of lust-leaked cries poured from his throat.

Delicious.

"Al, stop. Get off and take of your pants."

"h-huh?"

"Your pants. Get off me and remove them. Get naked."

"Ah… o-okay." He winced at having to stand, brow furrowing in pain as he fumbled clumsily with his button and zipper. I crossed my legs to hide my hard on and suckled calmly on my frozen treat. It was beginning to melt quite rapidly now, a sharp tingle zinging in my mouth.

"Good boy…" I mused, more to myself, as he finally managed to get his lower half stripped of clothes. Anxiously clutching the hem of his button shirt, upper legs squeezed together and tense with arousal, he looked like a cute little child again. Innocent, scared, embarrassed…

What kind of innocent child likes it up the ass?

"Okay then Al, turn around and kneel down. Hold your hands behind your back and your face on the floor. Not your forehead, your cheek. And spread your legs."

Without a single complaint, he obliged. I sat there for a moment, drinking in the vision, letting the desperate dry rake of his breath dance delightfully up my spine. Ah, I could imagine his face… he'd be crying now, for sure…

I pushed Texas further up the bridge of my nose and slid off the desk, stepping over his pants and approaching the prone figure.

"Feeling okay, Alfred?"

"mhmm… yeah." He sounded breathy. Dizzy. In pain. His wrists behind his back shook, I noticed, as if he was having trouble getting them to stay there.

I looked for something I could use to my advantage here, and my eyes fell on his belt. One of those heavy leather ones, with the big tacky buckle. I grabbed it and belted up his wrists roughly. At first he seemed shocked, but it passed. He went back to shallow breathing and lusty, pointless whimpers of 'please' soon enough. I pulled the belt as tight as it would go and forced the pin through the leather to secure it in the buckle. Perfect. My hand smoothed down the ridge of his spine and caressed the swell of his ass. He squeaked.

"Hm?" I mumbled, rubbing the left side ever so gently and kneeling down. His hips jerked and I kissed the spot I nursed. Smooth white skin, soft and delicious. My tongue flickered over the surface and he flat whined. A high pitched, miserable noise I couldn't help but chuckle at.

"Oh Al, you are so _needy_." I smacked him lightly, delighting in the flush of red that spread from the contact and kissed his tail bone. One, two, three little pecks.

I trailed down.

My hand not holding the ice block continued to massage the sweet rises of flesh as my mouth worked downward. As I drew closer and closer, I retired my lips, needing to utilize my tongue in order to get a little better… reacquainted with the parts of him I had explored many times before.

"a-ah! ARTHUR!" his body spasmed, face sliding forward across the floor when I reached my destination. I could hear the desperation in his voice. The fingers I was using to kneed his ass sliped between his legs and to the floor, a squeak resonated as I slid them across the wood but became silent when meeting with a puddle of precum pooling beneath him. There was a lot. I felt a little more drip on the back of my hand, and the sensation made me laugh a little. I sucked softly, rolling my tongue in circles against him, and raised my slick hand to his massive erection. I could feel it pulse with heat in my hand. My finger teased, circling the head and back to his balls, around to where I was kissing and teasing, slipping inside.

Alfred had by now completely lost the ability to speak.

Gurgled, desperate whines and cries. Sobs and desperate pleas for more were choked endlessly from his chest, but I heeded them not, taking it just as slow and steady as I had been. I wiggled my fingertip and pulled back. His shirt was wet with sweat. He was shaking.

"God Al, you look a little hot. Want me to cool you down?" I made sure he could hear me sucking the ice lolly again, licking the drips and enjoying the taste. Unable to respond in any understandable form of English, Alfred grunted, and I was surprised by how composed and sure the sound was. It made me even more eager, I think. Because it revealed something very vital and valuable to me.

The only reason I was doing this, was because he was letting me. Because he genuinely wanted me to humiliate him.

I'd never admit it, but without this grace I doubt I could ever get the mighty nation of America spread before me like this.

I valued that trust.

Fiercely determined to oblige to his wishes and humiliate him as much as I possibly could, I pulled the Ice block from my lips and pressed the tip to the quivering, flushed spot on his body. Carefully removing my fingertip, I rubbed the very rim and spread it open a little, the ice block had a diameter of about 3cm, which was small considering what he was used to, but when it came to al size didn't matter. A little dribble of cold webbed its way through my fingers. He gasped haltingly, shuddering.

"This wont hurt, but it'll be fucking cold."

He keened long and ecstatic when I slipped the ice block inside.

I thrust it in as far as I could, about fifteen centimetres worth, so that only the stick was left protruding. Of course it wouldn't hurt him from stretching, but I knew if I left it to long without moving it would freeze burn him. I withdrew the thing again before pushing it back. Smooth, easy motions lubricated by the ices contact with his hot insides.

"Oh… oh Arthur…"

"Do you like it?" I kissed the small of his back and leaned over him. My lips brushed the nape of his neck, I struggled to hold myself up in this position, but I made sure to insert the ice block at just the right angle at just the right teasing speed. My breath fogged the inside of his glasses, and my vision was compromised, but that was okay because I could still feel him and sense him with every fibre of my being.

"mmm… yes. Arthur, yes…"

"Do you want more?"

"Please… more." His heavy breath, bleary blue eyes opened, unfocused and but fixed on my face. A weak smile, my heart leapt. "Give me everything you have, Arthur."

With hurried hands, I undid his wrists so he could hold himself up and latched onto his mouth. Instead of using his freed hands to prop himself, he dragged me forward. I lost grip on the ice lolly for a moment, but couldn't complain, he was dragging my tongue into his mouth, sucking desperately and tumbling backward. I fell sideways and wasted no time rolling on top if him, between his spread legs. His hips rose. Our lips rejoined and I found the ice block stick again, pistoning it in and out with renewed vigour. It was melted almost completely now, and I felt a pang of regret. He still hadn't came.

Fuck it.

I withdrew and cast the useless remnants of ice block aside. A surprised little murmur, I forced him silent with a jab of my tongue. My hands had no problem undoing my pants, I freed my erection and rubbed it a little, finally giving in to the throb with a delighted groan on my part. I grabbed his lifted hips and pressed inside.

"Oh god Alfred!" my hands shifted from his hips to his hair. I buried my face in the side of his neck, gasping, lower body turning to mush. Where usually there was heat and tightness was a delicious, wet cold, sucking me in and sending shivers right up my spine. He clawed my shoulder blades and arched harder, one leg thrown across my back and hooking there as firmly as possible. His neck tasted like the tears that had tracked there, his scent heavy with hormones and sweat.

"Arthur!"

"ngh… I sunk my teeth into his throat and began to thrust. The feeling of slipping so easily inside him, the _smell_ of raspberry ice-lolly. Tracks of sticky cold melt slithered down my legs and I pushed even harder, hammering into him. He clenched and unclenched around me, I realised that the friction was warming him inside, as well as all through my lower body. The heave of his clothed chest, his hips slamming upwards to reach mine. I didn't usually like to do it facing him, I didn't like the way he had to bend his back. After all, I was here to humiliate and pleasure him, right, not break his spine. He didn't seem to care though, in that moment. I pushed the thought aside and thrust harder.

"A-Arthur…"

"Wha'?"

"T-touch me. Please Arthur touch me." fresh tears, he nuzzled my hair and squeezed the back of my neck. I felt his frantic kisses all over my face. My one hand made its way down his body and of course I began stroking him swiftly. Each one beckoned a new, louder, more passionate cry forth from. His voice would be horse soon. Neither of us cared.

"A-Arthur I'm coming!"

"No!" I hissed, rubbing his dick even faster. "Don't you dare come first. You dirty whore."

"Arthur I can't!"

"Don't you dare!"

"I can't Arthur. Oh god Arthur. Fuck. Fuck. Arthur. !" his body froze rigidly for a moment. I growled and slammed into him as hard as I possibly could before he clamped down on me and positively screamed my name. His body buckled powerfully, his shuddering making me shudder too. I wondered if it had hurt him, this climax. He seemed positively shattered.

That thought disappeared completely when his muscles began twitching and fluttering around me. I gasped and shivered, releasing inside his body and collapsing on top of a still squirming teenager without bothering to withdraw. My breath was short, my head spinning… I could feel myself begin to drip out of him around me, smearing all over my upper thighs and puddling in the floor below.

His body, still slightly arched beneath me, finally relaxed with a moan. He still shook a little; his arms around me fell limp to his sides.

"A-Alfred?" I rolled off him and absentmindedly wiped cum off my shirt. "Are you okay?"

"nnngh." An indistinct noise. He twitched a little and opened a single, dilated eye. "Fantastic."

He could barely form the words. His voice, breathy and quiet, seemed so insubstantial I thought it might be whispered away by the air itself. The beatific smile he gave me was so delicate and weak I felt tears prickle my eyes. I'd never seen anything as beautiful in my life.

"Come here you." I drew him into a sitting position and he flopped bonelessly against my chest. His head lolled, his whole body was limp. I gave him a squeeze and kissed the crown of his head.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"Arthur, I will never feel this happy again."

I smiled to myself, stroking his now tousled spun gold hair.

He said that every time.

…

I don't own hetalia or anything like that.

And now, ladies and gentlemen, for your pleasure, I have provided a hillbilly translation of this fic in the next chapter.

Bitch, I aint even fucking kidding. Click the button if you don't believe me.


	2. hillbilly vershun

Th' ice lolly was meltin', sticky raspberry dripped onto mah knuckles, but ah didn't notice. He held mah attenshun, a tall man, broad sh'dered an' yo'thful, wif eleckric eyes thet nevah rested t'long on one point. Violent blue, sparklin' like lop glass in th' sunlight, he looks away fum me an' runs elegant fingers through shaggy blonde hair. One mutinous lock reJawjad stan'in', ereck an' quivahin'. He parts bowed lips t'speak, ah don't bother t'lissen. His wo'ds is foolish, yo'ng, acco'din' t' th' code o' th' heells! They fo'm ideas of zombie viruses an' mega-fightin' car-bot wars. Nothin' valid, th' whims of a man wif ADD an' too much power fell on mah deaf ears an' lost in thunk ah raised th' ice block t'mah lips. A small suck, th' flavour was tart but ah liked it.  
>"Hey, Iggy, is yo' lissenin'?"<br>"No." ah tilted mah haid t'th' side, watchin' wif interess as his hansum face registered shock an' then mild offense, mouth twistin' into a small pout. He pushed his glasses further up th' bridge of his nose.  
>"But ah need yer he'p! Fry mah hide! How is ah supposed t'build mah car-bot wifout yer money?"<br>"ah didn't raise yo' t'piss away money on car-bots, A'fred, cuss it all t' tarnation." T'other suck on mah ice block. Shet mah mouth! "Yo' hoof it ahaid an' does whutevah yo' like, ah pow'ful don't care, but I'm not he'pin' yo' an' ah's hankerin' nothin' t'do wif it."  
>Th' man wasn't happy. His sh'ders slumped noticeably, his eyes narrowed into an evil glare. It was fo'tunate we were alone; th' shadow of ill hoomour thet dexcended upon th' small office was inough t'make enny hoomin heartily depressed, cuss it all t' tarnation.<br>"Whut in tarnation is yo' tryin' t'say?"  
>"I'm sayin', A'fred, cuss it all t' tarnation. Thet yer ideas is stoopid an' thet yer a bad, bad fella. Yo' need t'larn t'grow up an' begin spendin' money on impo'tant thin's, like kincer research an' indin' povahty."<br>"Oh whut does yo' know, yo''re jest a stoopid old man" he tosted his haid an' sat down on th' edge of his desk. Shet mah mouth! It creaked unner his weight. A'fred looked fit inough, but wif all th' burgers an' sweets he ate, it was a case of looks kin be deceivin'.  
>ah scowled an' stood, cuss it all t' tarnation.<br>"Yo''re a brat, yo' knows thet? All yo' evah reckon about is grub an' sex an' car-bots." ah pressed th' tip of mah ice block t'his throat, stan'in' on mah toes so mah eyes were level wif his. Them gemlike eyes fixed on mah face; ah narrowed mah own, challengin' him, dawgone it.  
>This hyar was th' nature of us, ah suppose. Adoppive brothers, Pappy an' son, inemies wif ties thet webbed beneath our hide like veins. These seams thet boun' us aginst our will sometimes flooded wif hate, other times a peekoolyar pride in one t'other. Sometimes still, they pulsed wif tenshun relieved only by th' touch of han's an' hide, kisses burnin' wif fierce rivalry, th' body of th' enemah, a mockery of th' days we spent as fambly.<br>This hyar was th' nature of mah fickle son, an' th' lessons ah had larned fum him on over th' years. We were as bad as etch other, infecked by one t'other; we were parts of th' same whole.  
>We made a decent team, despite th' obvious flaws.<br>So ah suppose, on th' surface, it made sense.  
>"Car-bots is impo'tant, ah reckon. Who else will defend us when we is invaded by mars?"<br>"Eff'n we is invaded by mars." ah slid th' ice lolly up his neck, along his jaw t'his ear. A faint, glissenin' red line of raspberry reJawjad, cuss it all t' tarnation. His eyes flickered shet an' ah smirked widely. "Say it, Al, ah reckon. Eff'n we is invaded by mars."  
>"We will be invaded by mars."<br>"tsk tsk… even at a time like this hyar yo' misbehave. Do as yer told jest once in yer life." ah lean in an' helter-skelter mah tongue along his jaw, lappin' up th' right fine trail lef' on his hide. "Yeah?"  
>"wh-whut will yo' does if ah don't?"<br>"Wal, yo' hafta be punished, don't yo'?"  
>"An' eff'n I'm fine?"<br>"Then yo' git a reward, cuss it all t' tarnation."  
>"hmm…" ha'f cast eyes rested on mah han', still holdin' th' ice lolly t'th' side of his law. Perhaps he c'd only see it wif peripheral vishun. In enny case, th' unfocused blue was indless, breathtakin'. Familiar.<br>"Wal, ah suppose yo''d better punish me then, as enny fool kin plainly see. On account o' id rather die than give up mah car-bots."  
>"Git." ah pressed mah leg between his an' his chin fell fo'ward, hair obscurin' his face.<br>Mah knee, ah groun' it upward, not missin' th' white knuckles thet implied a tightened grip on th' edge of th' desk. Shet mah mouth! ah nuzzled his bangs sof'ly, mah free han' caressin' his cheek an' grabbin' his chin, as enny fool kin plainly see. A sharp gasp was th' only thin' he gave me, a mino' indicashun of th' hammerin' heartbeat ah c'd feel echoed in mah chest. Mah lips flirted wif his jaw line, teasin' th' mighty co'ner of his mouth. When our lips met, ah dropped mah han', mah face holdin' his in place.  
>His lips is mighty chapped, acshully. ah allus took care of mine, th' small rose chapstick ah carried in mah ass pocket was somewhut of a moot t'tease in th' eyes of nashuns like France, but it was all wo'th it t'turn this hyar li'l brat t'jelly. His eager tongue c'dn't resist flickin' fo' a taste, his neat teeth curiously nibblin', tryin' th' waters. ah reined him in wif a thrett upin' nip, takin' mah sweet time an' slippin' aginst his tongue, pressin' a li'l, strokin', toyin'. A muffled groan, th' faintess grind upward aginst mah hip. His tongue laxed an' let me plunner th' inside of his mouth. Th' roof, his teeth, ah massaged etch spot wif dedicated cornsiderashun, coaxin' carnal soun's fum deep inside his chest.<br>When ah pulled back, his cheeks had darkened cornsiderably. His eyes glazed, cuss it all t' tarnation. A slenner strin' of saliva, glissenin' an' taught, slung between out lips lazily. ah wiped mah mouth on th' back of mah han' an' murmured a disgested sumpin, a blush of embarrassment fluttered on over his already pinkened cheeks. Th' wholesome flush of a virgin was replaced wif th' wanton, hoomiliated red of a li'l bitch. ah smirked an' groun' mah leg harder. His lips parted in a sof' moan, eyes fallin' shet. ah licked th' drippin's of ice block off mah han' carelessly an' regarded him wif a calm eye.  
>"Yer hankerin' it Al?"<br>Starin' pointedly at th' spot t'th' lef' side of mah face, he nodded, expresshun pained, cuss it all t' tarnation.  
>"No, yo' say it, o' yo' git nothin'." Mah leg agin. t'other strangled moan, he crumpled completely aginst me, legs givin' way. His haid shook fiercely.<br>"Oh? Whut in tarnation a shame. An' look atcha too, completely desperate. Have yo' been starved, Al? Yo''ve been waitin' fo' ages, haven't yo'?"  
>Pleadin' eyes met mine, he clawed at mah shirt an' th' burnin' fevah ah had see lurkin' at th' back of his mind fo' th' past week suddenly allered t'flood t'th' surface. It was amoosin' t'see, acshully, af'er watchin' it barely corntained through meetin' af'er meetin'. Through seemin'ly no'mal cornvahsashuns an' avahage argoomnts.<br>"Please Ezekiel…"  
>"Yo' were waitin' fo' this hyar exack moment though. ah know. Whuffo' else did yo' invite me hyar t'yer office? As eff'n yo''d give a dadburn about mah opinion on yer stoopid car-bots…"<br>"Ezekiel…"  
>"'oh, Iggy, mind a-comin' through t'talk t'me fo' a moment about a noo idea of mine?'" ah did mah best, an' surprisin'ly passable imitashun of his drawlish southern accent as ah quoted him, dawgone it. "yo' may as fine haf said 'Ezekiel, fuck me please, ah need it."<br>A sof' whimper, he nuzzled mah shirt. Th' malicious curve of mah lip grew mo'e pronounced an' ah tongued mah ice block, givin' him a tho'oughly bo'ed look. Shet mah mouth!  
>"Fine." ah ruffled his hair an' stepped back, leavin' him t'ketch hisse'f. "Eff'n yer hankerin' it so bad, beg me. Git down on yer knees an' beg, acco'din' t' th' code o' th' heells!"<br>He seemed surprised at thet, lips fo'min' a slack 'o'. ah cocked an eyebrow an' inclined mah haid down, as enny fool kin plainly see. He knowed whut ah meant.  
>Kneel<br>Humbly, holdin' back tears, he lowered hisse'f t'his knees an' shuffled fo'ward, cuss it all t' tarnation. His han's on mah belt buckle took me by surprise. ah jumped an' whacked his han's away.  
>"Not today yo' prick! Fry mah hide! ah said beg, not suck me off."<br>His lip trembled an' he lowered his haid. ah used mah foot t'tip his chin back, so he was lookin' at me.  
>"Please… Ezekiel."<br>"Please Ezekiel whut?"  
>"Please… fuck me."<br>ah grinned even wider. Vicko'y.  
>"No."<br>He blinked, lookin' fo' a moment like ah had kicked him, dawgone it. ah patted his haid as ah roun'ed him an' sat on th' edge of his desk. Shet mah mouth!  
>"But feel free t'come hyar an' fuck mah leg eff'n yo' wish." ah offered mah right leg t'him, he gazed at me hopelessly on over his sh'der.<br>"Come on then, as enny fool kin plainly see."  
>ah shuffled fo'ward further, so th' ball of mah foot was flush aginst th' wooden flore. He removed his glasses wif shakin' han's an' stood, cuss it all t' tarnation. ah held out a palm in an offer t'take th' glasses fum him but as he approached, he placed them tennerly on th' bridge of mah nose instead, cuss it all t' tarnation.<br>"Take care of Texas, please."  
>Thet comment, sech a hoomble, junuine request, threw me off fo' an instant. a small window of time in which ah suddenly felt a rush of affeckshun an' on overwhelmin' love fo' th' man was slammed shet agin as soon as he straddled mah upper leg an' placed his han's firmly on th' desk eifer side of mah hips.<br>"Do yer hankerin' me t'kiss yo' while yo' does it?" ah inquired, bracin' mahse'f wif one arm fo' whut was about t'foller. He nodded, an' lif'ed his face a li'l, implo'in'ly. Th' faint pucker of his lips was almost sweet. ah tried not t'loose heart in whut was gwine on, as enny fool kin plainly see. Mah face slammed aginst his an' ah fo'ced mah way back inside his mouth. He groaned an' slowly, hesitantly, groun' hisse'f aginst mah thigh.  
>His ereckshun muss haf been painful, ah reckon. It pressed hard aginst mah leg an' tented th' tight denim of his jeans dramatically. ah twirled mah tongue a li'l an' focused in th' feelin' of it slidin' aginst me. ah liked it, ah liked it a lot.<br>But ah had long on account o' mastered igno'in' mah own, as enny fool kin plainly see.  
>Mebbe I'm a fine varmint, mebbe ah git mo'e pleasure outta pleasin' him than he gits outta pleasin' me. It didn't particularly matter. Mah sole purpose today was t'make him cum as messily an' as undignified as ah postibly c'd. ah c'd haf a wank later, eff'n th' need arose. A'fred c'd only be see t'now.<br>He sped up as ah dipped deeper into his mouth, muffled moanin' punckuated by th' obscene soun' of cloth aginst cloth, th' slick smack of lips an' tongues, irregular gasps fo' air. His arms suppo'tin' him on th' desk quivahed, ah removed mah lips fum his an' licked them, a flood of lest-leaked cries poured fum his throat.  
>Delicious.<br>"Al, stop. Git off an' take of yer pants."  
>"h-huh?"<br>"Yer pants. Git off me an' remove them, dawgone it. Git naked, cuss it all t' tarnation."  
>"Ah… o-okay." He winced at havin' t'stan', brow furrowin' in pain as he fumbled clumsily wif his button an' zipper. ah crosted mah legs t'hide mah hard on an' suckled calmly on mah frozen treat. It was beginnin' t'melt quite rapidly now, a sharp tin'le zin'in' in mah mouth.<br>"Good fella…" ah moosed, mo'e t'mahse'f, as he finally managed t'git his lower ha'f stripped of clo'es. Anxiously clutchin' th' hem of his button shirt, upper legs squeezed togither an' tense wif arousal, he looked like a hansum li'l chile agin. Innercent, scared, embarrassed…  
>Whut in tarnation kind of innercent chile likes it up th' ass?<br>"Okay then Al, turn aroun' an' kneel down, as enny fool kin plainly see. Hold yer han's behind yer back an' yer face on th' flore. Notcher fo'ehaid, yer cheek. Shet mah mouth! An' spread yer legs."  
>Wifout a sin'le complaint, he obliged, cuss it all t' tarnation. ah sat thar fo' a moment, six packin' in th' vishun, lettin' th' desperate dry rake of his breath dance delightfully up mah spine. Ah, ah c'd imagine his face… he'd be cryin' now, fo' sho'nuff…<br>ah pushed Texas further up th' bridge of mah nose an' slid off th' desk, steppin' on over his pants an' approachin' th' prone figger.  
>"Feelin' okay, A'fred?"<br>"mhmm… yeah." He soun'ed breathy. Dizzy. In pain, as enny fool kin plainly see. His wrists behind his back shook, ah noticed, as eff'n he was havin' trouble gittin' them t'stay thar.  
>ah looked fo' sumpin ah c'd use t'mah advantage hyar, an' mah eyes fell on his belt. One of them heavy leather ones, wif th' trimenjus tacky buckle. ah grabbed it an' belted up his wrists roughly. At fust he seemed shocked, but it passed, cuss it all t' tarnation. He went back t'shaller breathin' an' lesty, pointless whimpers of 'please' soon inough. ah pulled th' belt as tight as it'd hoof it an' fo'ced th' pin through th' leather t'secure it in th' buckle. Puffick. Mah han' smoothed down th' ridge of his spine an' caressed th' sfine of his ass. He squeaked, cuss it all t' tarnation.<br>"Hm?" ah mumbled, rubbin' th' lef' side evah so juntly an' kneelin' down, as enny fool kin plainly see. His hips jerked an' ah kissed th' spot ah nursed, cuss it all t' tarnation. Smooth white hide, sof' an' delicious. Mah tongue flickered on over th' surface an' he flat whined, cuss it all t' tarnation. A high pitched, mizzuable noise ah c'dn't he'p but chuckle at.  
>"Oh Al, yer so needy." ah smacked him lightly, delightin' in th' flush of red thet spread fum th' contack an' kissed his tail bone. One, two, three li'l pecks.<br>ah trailed down, as enny fool kin plainly see.  
>Mah han' not holdin' th' ice block corntinued t'massage th' sweet rises of flesh as mah mouth wawked downward, cuss it all t' tarnation. As ah drew closer an' closer, ah retired mah lips, needin' t'utilize mah tongue in o'der t'git a li'l better… reacquainted wif th' parts of him ah had splored menny times befo'e.<br>"a-ah! Fry mah hide! ARTHUR! Fry mah hide!" his hide spasmed, face slidin' fo'ward acrost th' flore when ah retched mah destinashun. ah c'd hear th' desperashun in his voice. Th' fingers ah was usin' t'kneed his ass sliped between his legs an' t'th' flore, a squeak resonated as ah slid them acrost th' wood but became silent when meetin' wif a puddle of precum poolin' beneath him, dawgone it. Thar was a lot. ah felt a li'l mo'e drip on th' back of mah han', an' th' sensashun made me laugh a li'l. ah sucked sof'ly, rollin' mah tongue in circles aginst him, an' raised mah slick han' t'his massive ereckshun. ah c'd feel it pulse wif heat in mah han'. Mah finger teased, circlin' th' haid an' back t'his balls, aroun' t'whar ah was kissin' an' teasin', slippin' inside.  
>A'fred had by now completely lost th' ability t'speak. Shet mah mouth!<br>Gurgled, desperate whines an' cries. Sobs an' desperate pleas fo' mo'e were choked indlessly fum his chest, but ah heeded them not, takin' it jest as slow an' steady as ah had been, as enny fool kin plainly see. ah wiggled mah fingertip an' pulled back. Shet mah mouth! His shirt was wet wif sweat. He was shakin'.  
>"God Al, yo' look a li'l hot. Want me t'right fine yo' down?" ah made sho'nuff he c'd hear me suckin' th' ice lolly agin, lickin' th' drips an' injoyin' th' taste. Unable t'respond in enny unnerstan'able fo'm of English, A'fred grunted, an' ah was surprised by how composed an' sho'nuff th' soun' was. It made me even mo'e eager, ah reckon. On account o' it revealed sumpin mighty vital an' valuable t'me.<br>Th' only reason ah was doin' this, was on account o' he was lettin' me. On account o' he junuinely wanted me t'hoomiliate him, dawgone it.  
>I'd nevah admit it, but wifout this hyar grace ah doubt ah c'd evah git th' mighty nashun of South Car'lina spread befo'e me like this.<br>ah valued thet trest.  
>Fiercely determined t'oblige t'his wishes an' hoomiliate him as much as ah postibly c'd, ah pulled th' Ice block fum mah lips an' pressed th' tip t'th' quivahin', flushed spot on his hide. Carefully removin' mah fingertip, ah rubbed th' mighty rim an' spread it open a li'l, th' ice block had a diameter of about 3cm, which was small cornsiderin' whut he was used to, but when it came t'al size didn't matter. A li'l dribble of cold webbed its way through mah fingers. He gasped haltin'ly, shudderin'.<br>"This hyar wont hurt, but it'll be fuckin' cold, cuss it all t' tarnation."  
>He keened long an' ecstatic when ah slipped th' ice block inside.<br>ah threst it in as far as ah c'd, about fif'een centimetres wo'th, so thet only th' stick was lef' protrudin'. Of course it'dn't hurt him fum stretchin', but ah knowed eff'n ah lef' it t'long wifout movin' it'd freeze burn him, dawgone it. ah wifdrew th' thin' agin befo'e pushin' it back. Shet mah mouth! Smooth, easy moshuns lubricated by th' ices corntack wif his hot insides.  
>"Oh… oh Ezekiel…"<br>"Do yo' like it?" ah kissed th' small of his back an' leaned on over him, dawgone it. Mah lips brushed th' nape of his neck, ah struggled t'hold mahse'f up in this hyar posishun, but ah made sho'nuff t'insert th' ice block at jest th' right angle at jest th' right teasin' speed, cuss it all t' tarnation. Mah breath fogged th' inside of his glasses, an' mah vishun was compromised, but thet was okay on account o' ah c'd still feel him an' sense him wif ev'ry fibre of mah bein'.  
>"mmm… yessuh. Ezekiel, yessuh…"<br>"Do yer hankerin' mo'e?"  
>"Please… mo'e." His heavy breath, bleary blue eyes opened, unfocused an' but fixed on mah face. A weak smile, mah heart leapp. "Gimme ev'rythin' yo' have, Ezekiel."<br>Wif hurried han's, ah undid his wrists so he c'd hold hisse'f up an' latched onto his mouth. Instead of usin' his freed han's t'prop hisse'f, he dragged me fo'ward, cuss it all t' tarnation. ah lost grip on th' ice lolly fo' a moment, but c'dn't complain, he was draggin' mah tongue into his mouth, suckin' desperately an' tumblin' backward, cuss it all t' tarnation. ah fell sideways an' wasted no time rollin' on top eff'n him, between his spread legs. His hips rose. Our lips rejoined an' ah foun' th' ice block stick agin, pistonin' it in an' out wif renooed vigour. It was melted almost completely now, an' ah felt a pang of regret. He still hadn't came.  
>Fuck it.<br>ah wifdrew an' cast th' useless remnants of ice block aside. A surprised li'l murmur, ah fo'ced him silent wif a jab of mah tongue. Mah han's had no problem undoin' mah pants, ah freed mah ereckshun an' rubbed it a li'l, finally givin' in t'th' throb wif a delighted groan on mah part. ah grabbed his lif'ed hips an' pressed inside.  
>"Oh god A'fred! Fry mah hide!" mah han's shif'ed fum his hips t'his hair. ah buried mah face in th' side of his neck, gaspin', lower hide turnin' t'moosh. Whar usually thar was heat an' tightness was a delicious, wet cold, suckin' me in an' sendin' shivahs right up mah spine. He clawed mah sh'der blades an' arched harder, one leg thrown acrost mah back an' hookin' thar as firmly as postible. His neck tasted like th' tears thet had tracked thar, his scent heavy wif ho'mones an' sweat.<br>"Ezekiel! Fry mah hide!"  
>"ngh… ah sunk mah teeth into his throat an' began t'threst. Th' feelin' of slippin' so easily inside him, th' smell of raspberry ice-lolly. Tracks of sticky cold melt slifered down mah legs an' ah pushed even harder, hammerin' into him, dawgone it. He clenched an' unclenched aroun' me, ah realised thet th' frickshun was warmin' him inside, as fine as all through mah lower hide. Th' heave of his clothed chest, his hips slammin' upwards t'retch mine. ah didn't usually like t'do it facin' him, ah didn't like th' way he had t'bend his back. Shet mah mouth! Af'er all, ah was hyar t'hoomiliate an' pleasure him, right, not bust his spine. He didn't seem t'care though, in thet moment. ah pushed th' thunk aside an' threst harder.<br>"A-Ezekiel…"  
>"Wha'?"<br>"T-touch me. Please Ezekiel touch me." fresh tears, he nuzzled mah hair an' squeezed th' back of mah neck. Shet mah mouth! ah felt his frannic kisses all on over mah face. Mah one han' made its way down his hide an' of course ah began strokin' him swif'ly. Etch one beckoned a noo, louder, mo'e passhunate cry fo'th fum. His voice'd be houn'dog soon, as enny fool kin plainly see. Neifer of us cared, cuss it all t' tarnation.  
>"A-Ezekiel I'm a-comin'! Fry mah hide!"<br>"No! Fry mah hide!" ah hissed, rubbin' his dick even faster. "Don't yo' dast come fust. Yo' dirty who'e."  
>"Ezekiel ah can't! Fry mah hide!"<br>"Don't yo' dast! Fry mah hide!"  
>"ah can't Ezekiel. Oh god Ezekiel. Fuck. Shet mah mouth! Fuck. Shet mah mouth! Ezekiel. ! Fry mah hide!" his hide froze rigidly fo' a moment. ah growled an' slammed into him as hard as ah postibly c'd befo'e he clamped down on me an' positively screamed mah name. His hide buckled pow'fully, his shudderin' makin' me shudder too. ah wonnered eff'n it had hurt him, this hyar climax. He seemed positively shattered, cuss it all t' tarnation.<br>Thet thunk disappeared completely when his mooscles began twitchin' an' flutterin' aroun' me. ah gasped an' shivahed, releasin' inside his hide an' collapsin' on top of a still squirmin' teenager wifout botherin' t'wifdraw. Mah breath was sho't, mah haid spinnin'… ah c'd feel mahse'f begin t'drip outta him aroun' me, smearin' all on over mah upper thighs an' puddlin' in th' flore below.  
>His hide, still slightly arched beneath me, finally relaxed wif a moan, as enny fool kin plainly see. He still shook a li'l; his arms aroun' me fell limp t'his sides.<br>"A-A'fred?" ah rolled off him an' absentmindedly wiped cum off mah shirt. "Is yo' okay?"  
>"nnngh." An indistinck noise. He twitched a li'l an' opened a sin'le, dilated eye. "Fantastic."<br>He c'd barely fo'm th' wo'ds. His voice, breathy an' quiet, seemed so insubstantial ah thunk it might be whispered away by th' air itse'f. Th' beatific smile he gave me was so delicut an' weak ah felt tears prickle mah eyes. I'd nevah see ennythin' as right purdy in mah life.  
>"Come hyar yo'." ah drew him into a sittin' posishun an' he flopped bonelessly aginst mah chest. His haid lolled, his whole hide was limp. ah gave him a squeeze an' kissed th' crown of his haid.<br>"Is yo' sho'nuff yo''re okay?"  
>"Ezekiel, ah will nevah feel this hyar happy agin."<br>ah smiled t'mahse'f, strokin' his now tousled spun gold hair.  
>He said thet ev'ry time.<p>

…

Told ya. Aint this just the most badass motherfuckin shit yo ever seen?

No, I don't own hillbilly hetalia either.

… im not sure id want to…


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